Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Gay Marriage: Common Sense is not so Common

Gay Marriage: 
Common Sense is not so Common

The LGBTQ community deserves absolute support in their pursuit for social and legal equality, and it is utterly ridiculous that we are still arguing about gay marriage, such a thing should be common sense. There is no logical reason why two consenting adults should not be able to do anything they like with each other, including get married. The gender or sex of the people involved is no one’s business and is of no consequence to anyone outside of that marriage. This is not just a matter of gay rights; it is a matter of civil rights and personal freedoms.

The illusion that gay marriage affects everyone, or anyone, is absurd. Gay marriage has never caused a heterosexual marriage to fail unless one of the people in the couple wasn’t really straight in the first place. Certainly infidelity and divorce are far greater threats to “the sanctity” of marriage than two gay individuals getting married, but there are no riots on the street to have cheating and divorce criminalized or banned. There is also no public outcry for an end to cousins marrying. It is legal in all fifty states to marry your second cousin and twenty states allow first cousins to marry ("National conference of," 2012).

Sometimes there are not two equally valid sides of an argument...sometimes there is right and sometimes there is wrong, these are called facts. Everyone is entitled to have opinions....but that "it’s just my opinion" nonsense, coming from those who regard homosexuality as evil, usually comes from someone who was caught in a logical corner and has nothing else to say. Your freedom of opinion ends when that opinion in action threatens to violate someone else’s freedoms and rights. Those that oppose gay marriage are not simply "stating their opinion", they are promoting a platform if hate, ignorance, and prejudice and they mean to use that platform to oppress certain people and force their own view of proper societal conformity.

Of course people can have their own opinions about movies, music, food, art, etc...but it is crossing the bounds of reason with the "right to your opinion" thing when your opinion is that it is okay to discriminate a particular group of people and deny them equal rights and protections under the law....these are not okay opinions to have, and certainly no opinion is beyond the realm of criticism. When I hear, “that is my opinion and it is my right to have it", my thoughts are, ‘Yes, maybe, and it is my right to call you on your opinions and criticize their logical and moral flaws, and I will fight your opinions tooth and nail if they at all threaten to affect anyone in a negative way.’

Christians always point to the bible to justify their hatred of homosexuals, but the religious often nitpick through their scriptures looking for passages that justify their desired actions and ignore the passages that are an inconvenience to them. Christians typically ignore the passages condemning tattoos, mixed cloth, shellfish, and women talking ("I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man. She must be quiet." -God (1 Timothy 2:12)) and go right to the passages about stoning homosexuals to death. It is also true that Jesus is not known to have ever said anything about homosexuality, even the orators that told his story never claimed he said anything about it, but even if he had….so what? The bible, and supposedly god, condones slavery ("Slaves, be subject to your masters with all reverence, not only to those who are good and equitable but also to those who are perverse." (1 Peter 2:18)), rampant misogyny, polygamy, killing innocent children, massacring entire cities, flooding the whole world, and a myriad of violence in its entire splendor, "Go, now, attack Amalek, and deal with him and all that he has under the ban. Do not spare him, but kill men and women, children and infants, oxen and sheep, camels and asses." -God (1 Samuel 15:3). The bible is not personally where I would go to find perfect moral guidance.

If you still believe that being gay is evil I cannot stop you from thinking that way, but it really should not be a concern of yours (if you are not gay) so why interfere in the lives of others? There are couples BEGGING to be allowed to marry their loved one and not have to move to another state away from their friends and family to do it. You can live your own life by whatever code you choose, but if they want to rot in hell for all eternity, let them do it, it is their choice. No one should have the right to force their faith and beliefs on other people, especially by passing or supporting legislation that would restrict the freedoms of others.

Let’s suppose for a moment that gay marriage was bringing forth this change in the definition of marriage. I consider that to be a good thing, as marriage was traditionally intended to be a contract of an exchange of ownership. Men have, through most of history, legally OWNED their daughter’s and wives and could sell off their daughters like slaves. In many cases it was the prospective husband who had to procure a sum of money or goods to trade for a bride, but in some cultures, like parts of Europe, a “dowry” was required of the father to give to the husband upon a marriage agreement, making females a lowly burden to families; further ingraining the cultural understanding that females are inferior. In many cultures all around the world marriage is still pretty much the same. Marriage has been about ownership, status, politics, and business…but not love. Love is a very new understanding as a purpose or requirement for marriage, and the fact that it is at all means that we have already redefined marriage. So I am exceedingly relieved, that if marriage is to exist at all that, in this country at least, it is being redefined, as a union of mutual love and partnership between two consenting adults, no matter their sex/gender.  

It has been said a million times by all those who are rational, but it is still true, that it really shouldn’t matter who you love. The political right screams about small government and freedoms, but they ignore those words when it comes to dictating who you can marry, a woman’s reproductive rights, or the substances you can consume. The hypocritical right wing is fed by the fears and prejudices of an ignorant populace fooled by lunacy that is ages old, and in almost all the social problems I come across I see the same core issue…lack of education. I do not just mean school; I speak of a general lack of understanding and working knowledge of the world and a failure to see past one’s own limited experience. Knowledge is the finest cure against any prejudice. If only knowing were valued more than following, if only questioning were more valued than obeying. Hate is taught; it is not innate, whereas the inclination to explore is perfectly natural and should be nourished. So parents, please teach your children to appreciate the variety of life and seek a deeper understanding in all things and people, so that we may create a future where bigotry and prejudice is a thing of the past. Now is the time to give justice to the homosexual community and give them the same rights and legal protection that heterosexuals have always had. 

“Whenever the people are for gay marriage or medical marijuana or assisted suicide, suddenly the "will of the people" goes out the window.”   ~Bill Maher

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  1. Excellent article, well written.

  2. Very well said! I couldn't have said it better! Go Rhiannon! ( Jeff'S wife).